A Time For Faith

Lately, I have lacked faith, so I chose to explore the meaning of terms associated with faith to help me better understand it. Exploring these concepts requires an open mind rather than judgment. I continue to fall back on the suggestion from the Upanishads, an ancient text with a load of insight, which tells the reader to “Follow the advice of mine, which is good and helpful for your progress, and neglect even my own advice which is not.” You get to decide what you wish to take with you and what you would rather leave behind. After all, you are the creator of your own life.

My intention for this blog remains the same. I wish to use it as a way to help cultivate, understand, and share the things that give my life meaning. I hope that you too can do the same.

George Michael Agrees That We Gotta Have Faith

Faith is defined as having complete trust or confidence in something or someone. Faith is easy to possess when all is going according to plan. It is not so simple to maintain when entering the unknown. Take, for example, pregnancy. It is easy to have faith when you know what to expect, have control over outcomes, and there is no cause for concern. Unfortunately, pregnancy is none of these things. So for the past seven months, I have had one hell of a time trusting the process of bringing a life into this world.

Due to my lack of faith, I have battled with excessive worry and fear. I have also suffered by wanting things to be different than they are. My mind has been living in the realm of future thinking rather than being present with what is. My lack of faith has also taken away a lot of joy from this very experience.

I know I can choose to continue to suffer unnecessarily through my last trimester. But that sounds a bit dramatic and miserable. So, instead of carrying all of this doubt inside of me, I will attempt to mold it into a big ol’ radiant ball of faith to help me be more present with the wonderment of pregnancy- unknowns, food cravings, emotionality, and all.

Gladis Smart- A Woman of Faith

I was lucky enough to know a woman who had tremendous faith- my Grandma. Gladis Smart married Clyde Smart on June 26th, 1949. Fun fact: Our dog, Gladie Rutabaga (Rooty) Wetzel-Bentel, was born on June 26th, and I don’t think it was a coincidence. When I was little, I remember I chose to sit with my Grandma instead of my mom during a flight to the Midwest. This choice was a big deal for me since I was absolutely terrified of flying and seldom ventured too far away from my mom when I feared for my life. As luck would have it, there was a lightning storm taking place below us that lit up the darkness of the night sky. Our plane had to circle above the storm until it was safe to land.

I remember turning to my Grandma and asking her if our plane was going to crash. She looked me straight in the eyes and said, “Well, honey. Whatever is meant to be will be.” Then she settled back in her seat and softly closed her eyes, keeping a slight smile on her face. I wanted nothing more at that moment than to get up and trade seats with my sister so I could sit by my mom. But the fasten your seatbelt sign forced my tense body to sit with Gladie and her unshakable faith for the remainder of the flight. Eventually, we made a long, slow, and safe descent back to land. I never sat with my Grandma during a flight again.

Gladie knew the importance of living a life of faith. She also embodied the qualities of gratitude, love, and joy in everything she did. Gladie often laughed until she cried, played her squeaky piano and sang for all to hear, and even indulged in a shot glass full of wine from time to time. She knew the names of all the checkout ladies at her local grocery store and many of their life stories. Mrs. Smart was not afraid to cry when a song moved her. She had many friends and somehow did not pass judgment on a single soul. Though she was often in her nightgown until noon, she awoke each day with purpose. She had friends to call, love to give, people to help, bellies to feed, and songs to sing.

Gladie and The G Word

Another definition of faith is a strong belief in God or a religion based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof. Gladie also possessed this kind of faith. She practiced the power of prayer to manifest much of her reality. During her life, she used her relationship with her faith to help others in need. Once I frantically searched for my school binder while running late for class. “I’ll pray that you find it,” she yelled from the other room. “Thank God,” I mumbled. Then seconds later, it appeared. Coincidence? Maybe. But maybe not?

Some people have a negative connotation with the terms prayer, religion, and God. I, too, battle with the meaning of these terms. The closest I have ever felt to God was when I was in India completing my first teaching training. I experienced what it felt like to wake up each morning with purpose. I was there to learn, grow and discover things about this life that I did not quite understand. The practice of movement and meditation allowed me to experience unfamiliar aspects of my mind that were quiet and at rest. For the first time in my life, I felt as though everything up until that point made sense. All the bumps and obstacles were there for a reason. I experienced a new knowing that something bigger was at work—something I could not name or fully comprehend. This something some refer to as “God.” Others may refer to it as spirit, the universe, a higher power, or consciousness.

The terms associated with faith do not have to take place in a church or formal religious setting. The word religion comes from the word ligament, which holds things together. So the idea of religion is that it can help hold things together rather than allow them to fall apart. Religion can also be used as a reminder of the togetherness of everything. It can be followed as a personalized routine, practice, or ritual that reminds you of what matters most in this life.

Prayer is simply an intention. It is a way to direct your best energies toward someone or something in need. Prayer is also a way we lead our lives toward what we wish to be or what we wish to accomplish. It is another form of ritual that allows you to feel connected to another person, find guidance, and surrender to the unknown.

The term God carries a lot of weight. I believe this term can help deepen our awareness that life is a gift and how we respond to it matters. Having faith carries a deep knowing that everything we work so hard for we already have. We are already loved, whole, and complete without having to prove anything.

Spirituality is your full engagement with life. It means getting comfortable with the idea that there is so much we do not know. Yet knowing with certainty that there is something we cannot fully prove or perceive with our five senses that is a part of it all.

Faith does not mean the absence of fear, doubt, or struggle. Instead, it carries a deep understanding that we are here to experience the fullness of this life. The good. The bad. All of it. And we possess the capacity within us to handle it all. And when all is said and done, the purpose is to leave this Earth knowing we gave the gift of life our best shot.

When you wish to develop certain qualities, you can often do so by emulating someone who does possess them. I am grateful I knew a woman like my Grandma, who showed me the power of faith. Thinking about her life reminds me to remember ultimately what will be, will be. But also, the power of intention, belief, and practice are potent tools to help us navigate and live a purposeful life.

And no matter what happens, all of the uncontrollable and unknowns are all a part of a bigger plan that I may never see. Perhaps the only thing to do in these moments of doubt is to step back so faith can step in.