Disclaimer: “This blog post was written by Joe, not Kristin. Kristin is smarter, better-looking, and in many ways stronger than Joe. Kristin also bases her writing in sound research and painstaking effort. Joe does not”.
I have accepted the aforementioned disclaimer. I have accepted it and at this point in my life I am even able to enjoy it. Perhaps by the end of this writing experience, I will become enthusiastic about it.
1. Acceptance
The world is how it’s supposed to be. You found the missing set of keys. The kids play nicely all afternoon. Lawns turn green in May and there are no weeds. Your football team wins. These things are easy to accept.
The world is how it’s supposed to be. That dude in the loud pickup truck with big tires, was supposed to cut you off. The set of missing keys stays missing, forever. It rained on the day of your big outdoor bbq. Your football team lost. These things are somewhat difficult to accept.
The world is how it’s supposed to be. Your dog dies. A friend suffers the loss of a loved one. A family member is diagnosed with a fatal disease. Your football team moves to a different city. These events seem impossible to accept.
Nothing our minds create will ever be reality. No mental gymnastics will change what is. The brain wants to rationalize a situation that it can’t comprehend, and the suffering ensues.
What can we do but accept?
May 2023
I sit in the Seattle airport, early afternoon. Travelers of all shapes and sizes pass by. There are so many and they are all so different. Why do they talk that way? Who are they looking for? When did they look in the mirror last? I stop judging. I stop judging them and an immense sense of peace settles over me.
2. Enjoyment
What is there to enjoy about a sun-filled day? Everything. Is it possible to enjoy watching my football team win? Of course. Will I enjoy a full day of skiing with friends? Just try and stop me.
How can I enjoy being cut-off by a bad driver? What about the rainy day bbq? Is it possible to enjoy experiences that don’t align with our expectations? Yes, but it’s not easy.
What’s easy to do is to rant and rail when the world reveals how little it cares about our expectations, and this causes suffering, which could be considered the antonym of joy.
Here’s a mathematical formula: accepting crappy drivers = joy
This formula works because acceptance eliminates the option of suffering, leaving the antonym…joy.
What is there to enjoy about death, disease, and tragedy? Nothing, I suppose. It’s a stretch to suggest moving beyond the acceptance of these events. Perhaps death, disease, and tragedy check our expectations and highlight the need for more gratitude, and less attitude. Maybe, death isn’t as evil as I think it is. Maybe it’s a great teacher. And maybe I need to accept the lessons and instructions death provides. There is joy in this.
September 2023
I sit on the back porch of my house in the late evening. The silhouette of the forest frames the bottom of a clear sky. I see my soul soar away amongst the tops of the trees, forever outward and with unbridled freedom. The boundaries of mortality lifted, the suffering of my life forgotten. This is me enjoying my inevitable death.
3. en·thu·si·asm-/inˈTHo͞ozēˌaz(ə)m,enˈTHo͞ozēˌaz(ə)m/
Noun
Intense and eager enjoyment, interest, or approval.
Ex. “her energy and enthusiasm for life”
The world is how it’s supposed to be and I am trying to accept it for what it is, and enjoy the world in its honest state.
My life consists of events that are easy to be enthusiastic about, and events that are difficult if not impossible, to be enthusiastic about.
I know a guy who is enthusiastic about skiing. He is a guy who emanates an intense and eager enjoyment, interest and approval of skiing. His enthusiasm is contagious beyond the boundaries of snow and ice. His enthusiasm spills over into other areas of his life, into other people’s lives, infecting all that enter his sphere of influence.
I know a woman who has lived full of enthusiasm for her family, her work, her existence. Like a master cultivator, she has sowed the seeds of enthusiasm in all who have come in contact with her. Her overflowing energy and interest and enjoyment have influenced sons and daughters, husbands, friends, hundreds of school children who still speak her name with fondness of memory, neighbors and strangers. This woman’s eager enjoyment of life has influenced eternity, and there is no telling where her influence will stop. This is the power of enthusiasm.
I know a little dog who wakes up every morning with a dog-smile on her face, ready to kiss the day and any human who comes within a three foot radius. No matter what happened the previous day, or what might happen within the next 24 hours, this little dog will eagerly jump into the arms of her humans with the same loving interest and energy. This unfiltered and uninhibited enthusiasm can only come from a creature who lacks the intellectual capacity to cause itself unnecessary suffering and pain. I may be the ‘smartest animal’ in the house, but I am not the happiest.
QUESTION your MIND
Don’t believe that it always serves your best interests. Most times, it does not. Our flaw as humans, in my opinion, is our incredible intellect. This, ironically, is our greatest strength.
Can you accept reality? Can you enjoy reality? Can you be enthusiastic about reality?
Ask these questions the next time you go dancing.
Ask these questions the next time you get road rage.
Ask these questions of death.
