A Bad Review

Upon looking further into Bowman Hannah, I saw that she, or he, or they, or…robot? had given several other yoga studios a 1-star review. 

She left one for a studio in Hawaii. 

“Picture this: trees, grass, and an ocean view. I don’t like grass, trees, or water. I expected to be indoors under plastic palm tress, but this was not the case.” 

Another for a studio in Minneapolis. 

“My spirit was not cleansed. It was an awful yoga experience! I wanted food. They had no food. How am I supposed to eat without food? I CAN’T! This was an atrocity in the making.” 

And she even left one for a studio in California. 

“This place was an atrocity. They broke my spinal cord during stretches. I do not recommend unless you want brain trauma. I DIDN’T EVEN GET ANYMORE FLEXIBLE.” 

I told my husband about my bad review and he immediately looked at me with concerned eyes. He started to give me a pep talk because he assumed my mind was already spinning into worst-case-scenario thinking, and he likely figured he would have to listen to me obsess about it until my brain latched onto a different problem to solve. 

But he was wrong. I was surprisingly calm and unbothered by the review. I knew the truth. 

This whole thing was obviously a scam, which according to Google, is becoming more common. Scammers leave a business with one or several low-star reviews, and then ask for money to resolve the issue. 

“No one in their right mind will think that this review is real and therefore it won’t deter people away from trying my classes.” I told him.

Relieved, he agreed with me and we continued on with our lives. 

Until…

One day, I decided to share this story with two of my girlfriends. One of my friends said how she never even reads the reviews. She just looks at how many stars the business has and if it’s not at least a 4-star rating, she won’t set foot in the place. 

“Wait a minute. You mean to tell me that people may just see my average rating, without digging into why I am rated that way? And then, they may not even set foot in my studio because it’s now below 4-stars? That’s insane!” 

Now, my mind was spinning. 

Enter Yoga

The angst inside of me was stemming not from a trivial number of stars, but from the very principal of that matter.

Daily, I do my best to try and live by a set of moral codes to help me navigate life and be a stand-up human. One of the codes I try to live by within the yoga tradition is called satya. And satya means truthfulness. 

Not only do I try to be truthful by not filling the world with lies, but I also try to uncover what is true about myself, others, and the reality in which I live. 

This may seem like an easy task, however, it can be extremely challenging, especially in today’s world. 

The yoga tradition says that in order to know our true selves, we must muddle our way past all of our inner stories, beliefs, identifications, judgments, labels, and limitations. We basically must quiet the noise in our minds down enough so that we can experience the truth of who we are. 

To do this, we must access the field of silence as much as possible, because it is here, where we are less attached to our own stories and perceptions. We are also less attached to the programming we’ve inherited from other people and our interactions with the world.

Finding silence is not for the faint of heart because there’s a lot of noise in there!

If we wish to know the truth of who we are and experience the world as it truly is, then we not only must work to silence our inner dialogue, but also all of the noise found in our outside environment. And so much of this noise is not just coming from our experience with the tangible world itself, but also from our interactions with the digital world. 

So. Much. Noise. 

Back To Reviews 

Now, while reviews have their place, I also think it may be helpful to think of them as noise. And this noise has the power to influence how we experience our reality. We may think we are going into a yoga studio, restaurant, or hotel with a clear and open mind, however someone else’s opinion may have already influenced what we notice, feel, and remember. 

So even if we read several exceptional 5-star reviews, we may then go into that place of business with high expectations based on what we’ve read and then experience disappointment if they aren’t met. 

Or we may enter a place of business already expecting to have a bad experience after reading a few critical, less than 4-star reviews. Our expectations could cause us to overlook the things we otherwise would have enjoyed or make us hone in on the things that bother us that we otherwise would have overlooked. 

I am not suggesting that we all stop reading reviews. What I am suggesting is that we be aware that when we decide to look to the digital world for guidance, we may risk experiencing the world through other people’s noisy opinions about the world rather than through our own clear, eyes.  

We may also need to keep in mind that someone else’s online opinion may not be coming from a place of truth. We live in a world where not just real people, but online bots and AI-generated systems can say whatever they please. And sometimes these words can be careless. 

The internet is a representation of reality, not reality itself. And if we are to engage with this noise, we must be careful not to confuse what is popular, repeated, promoted, or highly rated, as the truth. Because in the end, it’s all just noise. 

And at the end of the day, if we wish to experience things for ourselves, as they really are, we must remove the noise in and around us. 

Returning To Truth 

I could lie and try to convince myself that I wasn’t bothered by this silly review. But the truth of the matter is, it bothered me. 

And so, this bothered part of me is just noise that asks me to go inward to connect with what is true so I can release what isn’t. 

So, I put my laptop and phone away, sat down, and closed my eyes to help dampen the noise from both my real and digital reality. 

Then, I was met with the noise of my inner world, which mainly consisted of judgement for myself, others and the world. This noise was a bit uncomfortable to listen to at first. So, I connected with my breath to help soothe my discomfort. The fullness of my breath also helped to create space between my body and my thoughts. 

Using the breath as my guide, I looked for the parts of me that felt bothered. 

I noticed a tightening in my chest that I recognized as anger. Behind that anger was a story of sadness about how I wished certain things didn’t exist in the world, like internet bots and scammers. I didn’t like how confusing it all was. 

I inhaled deeply into my chest and felt my heart expand. Then released the anger and sadness that my heart carried as I exhaled.

I noticed a sensation in my stomach that I recognized as embarrassment. Behind this embarrassment was a story of fear that someone may see this review and think that the studio that I’ve worked hard to build was not worth exploring. 

I inhaled deeply into my stomach and felt it fill with air. Then released the embarrassment and fear that my belly carried as I exhaled.

I noticed a buzzing in my forehead that I recognized as frustration. Behind this frustration was a story of disappointment about how these kinds of mistruths can negatively affect what other people have worked hard to build. 

I breathed deeply into these bothered parts of me until they slowly began to release and spaciousness replaced the tension that they carried. 

Then, my perception widened and I reframed these stories by replacing them with a narrative that felt loving and true. 

Those who know you, support you. It does not matter what people think of you. You know your intentions. Your job is to continue on. 

With that, I let it all go and reconnected with the truth of who I am while settling into a warm blanket of silence. 

And when I opened my eyes, I took a 5-star deep breath and continued on with life, unbothered.